Wednesday, September 28, 2005

disaster preparedness

Oh yeah, Saveur. I don't really have much. Let's just say that any time your solution to the problem involves making the type bolder, it's not a solution. [I defy anyone to come up with a more aesthetically irritating book than Ways of Seeing, printed entirely in bold]. This redesign is analogous to Morning Addition getting rid of Bob Edwards -- yeah, you have plenty of problems, and you just fixed exactly none of them. For starters, why do you still have those ridiculous brackety things on the corners? Turn off the fucking Pearl Jam and join us in the 21st century. Yeah, this one sucks too, but at least there's no goddamn "grunge."

Sorry: I got all pissed off about something and started preparing to to rip the whole magazine to shreds, but then I took a nap and forgot what it was. Instead, random observations: It's a tough argument the day after Tom DeLay is indicted, but Thomas Krens might actually be the biggest douchebag in the world. Another strong contender: bishop Athanasius of Alexandria, who wrote the Life of St. Anthony. They just found Anthony's monastery in Egypt.

I almost never write about tools because I'm just not that kind of guy. But my brand new Gerber Harsey Air Ranger folding clip knife is very satisfying. Part of my new disater preparedness plan. Just so you know, this is probably the last thing I will ever write with all ten fingers.


Blogger la depressionada said...

okay as far as ascetics go, but st simeon is my guy. he had style. you know st. anthony is the patron saint of bacon right?

Fri Sep 30, 07:38:00 PM GMT  
Blogger mmw said...

Simeon was a fucking freakshow. Sorry, you have to draw the line somewhere, and for me it's worms. His Vita is way more entertaining than Anthony's though. Not on the net, apparently.

Fuck food, henceforth I'm writing exclusively about hagiography and punctuation.

Fri Sep 30, 08:07:00 PM GMT  
Blogger alizinha said...

So who's the patron saint of punctuation?

Fri Sep 30, 09:28:00 PM GMT  
Blogger mmw said...


Just kidding, it's probably Aquinas.

Fri Sep 30, 09:39:00 PM GMT  
Anonymous Tana said...

Hmmm, i think that the world's biggest douchebag might be a little closer to the Very Very White House than Thomas Krens.

I vote for Bill Bennett. Douche-baggier yet is that he called criticism of him for saying what he did "ridiculous, stupid, totally without merit."

Ah, I love the smell of napalm in the morning.

Fri Sep 30, 10:29:00 PM GMT  
Blogger la depressionada said...

catherine of alexander altarboy. hagiography and punctuation? now you're in my court.

btw, what's you're favorite heresy?

Tue Oct 04, 01:41:00 AM GMT  
Blogger la depressionada said...

oops, alexandria. i now repair to peform a st. lucia. (kind of a good ste for food and proofreaders actually, no?)

Tue Oct 04, 01:44:00 AM GMT  
Blogger mmw said...

Best heresy: Franciscanism.
Worst: Protestantism.

But really, who can choose? They all have their charms.

Tue Oct 04, 06:12:00 PM GMT  

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