I have had a lot of really crappy stoves. For six (?) years I lived in a tiny apartment with a behemoth (irony!) with no thermostat and a hole in the back. Actually, the biggest irony was that it was (or had once been) white but the "brand" name was BROWN. God that cracked me up.
The thing about the BROWN stove was that it cranked out amazing food. The temperature range went all the way from on to off, and although I would very rarely modulate it by opening the door, mostly I just cooked everything at 500 degrees. I don't know how, but I fucking mastered that thing, everything from toast (the apt. was on a single 15 amp fuse, so no toaster) to a legendary rib roast. It took me two years to adjust to a normal shitty stove after I moved.
Anyway, yesterday we finally chucked the biscuit-colored MAGIC CHEF (even funnier than BROWN!) in favor of a new yuppie stove. Not a real yuppie stove, more of a brand aspirational stove but still. Fuck you, it is not stainless, but it does have continuous grates. It allegedly cleans itself and convects. I can only allege the last part because it immediately blew the GFI circuit which means I have to spend at least a weekend crawling around in filth and knocking holes in walls to rewire the kitchen. Which I guess is fitting punishment for buying a yuppie stove.